Plain? More like plain tacky!

So, I stumbled across this picture whilst browsing the internet and I was half disgusted and half Intrigued.

The paradox in this image is just too much!

Now, I love Louis Vuitton – but I must admit this is so tacky. I doubt Louis Vuitton would actually condone this sort of blasphemy on their iconic pattern. I secretly, deep down in my Croydonian fantasies do want my car seats upholstered in the classic LV print, however, this movement is way over the top and overflows on the desperate level of showing off. Some would even say: Ghetto.

But now, thanks to FIAT (please note the irony) if I really wanted to have a car like this, I could:

Fiat has unveiled the new 500c GUCCI edition, released in celebration for GUCCI's 90th anniversary. The car is exclusive in either black or white paint and is littered with reminders that the car is a “designer item”.

The roof has the GUCCI stripe, and the alloy wheels are centred with the GUCCI logo

The Gucci making this car look 'Hoochie'

The seats are part GUCCI leather with GUCCI patterned seat belts

Gucci overload

The rear decal is a glossy ‘GUCCI’ badge and if that wasn’t enough, an obnoxious GUCCI stripe can also be seen wrapped around the middle of the car.

Who cares?

This car is NOT sophisticated. It’s a wannabe’s car.

Anybody who feels the need to purchase a vehicle with designer logos and patterns emblazoned all over it, is low rent and cheap. Because everyone will know that in reality if you really had any class or MONEY you’d be driving a Mercedes or something similar.

NOT a Fiat.

This 500c GUCCI edition, to me, is boisterous, in your face and utterly stupid. You will never impress anybody with this car. I expect this car to be parked outside many a council house when it arrives in the UK fairly soon, as the only place this car belongs is in an estate with all the other cheap and nasty knock-offs – because after all that’s all it is.

With prices starting from £16,000 you can order your 500c GUCCI today via Fiats website, but I wouldn’t bother when you can get the better looking, better quality Audi A1, which starts at a little over £13,000. And for that you buy into a brand which doesn’t need to scream and shout to get attention.

Cadillac Blues

1959 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz

On my second birthday, my Nan sent me (all the way from America), a 1:18^th scale replica of a 1959 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz. It was Cream with red interior and rested on miniature Whitewalls. Being 2 years old, within ten minutes of it being unscrewed from its collectors stand; I had smashed that model into everything and anything I could. BUT I never threw it away and to this day, some 19 years later, I still have that crippled Cadillac in my collection of cars, because there was something so majestic and enchanting about the look of that toy, which is why it always remained my favourite.

Cadillac has served for its country, providing support to American Presidents such as Truman, Roosevelt, Eisenhower, Reagan, Bush, Nixon… I could go on – Even the current Presidential Limo in service is a 2009 Cadillac.

A brand which encompasses luxury, style, elegance and glamour.

Presley

Monroe

 Capone

Robinson

That's why I was more than pleased to learn of the 2013 line-up which Cadillac has in-store for us.

However, I think this is the problem

  Apart from the Escalade, the past 20, even 30 years hasn’t been great for Caddy. All of the previous individuals I’ve mentioned are long gone or not even relevant anymore –

Just like Cadillac.

The 80’s saw Cadillac churn out small, ugly vehicles such as the Cimarron which shared its platform with the disgusting  Chevrolet Cavalier and the sick joke which is the Oldsmobile Firenza...

1985 Oldsmobile Firenza

Unsurprisingly sales were slow and people were turned off and lured in by the far better build quality and reliability of Japanese and European manufacturers.

 The 90’s offered nothing more than bloated, slow and frankly visually offensive vehicles such as the 1994 Seville and the Catera: A re-badged Vauxhall Omega to you and me. And with a car named suspiciously close, I wouldn't be surprised if inspiration for design  were made from a person suffering with a Cataract.

1999 'Cadillac' Catera

 Oh. Dear.

 

The early 00’s looked unpromising, but then came the second-gen Escalade, the ONLY Cadillac of this decade, in my opinion to truly ooze class and sophistication. The Escalade has been subjected to a number of variations such as the EXT, a pick-up version, the ESV, an extended 8 seat version and a Hybrid was put in to production in 2009.

2013 Cadillac XTS

And, this is why I am SO excited about the new line-up, which I feel Cadillac has brought back the desirability and glamour to its products. The 2013 ATS and XTS unveiled in January both appear solid, handsome and modern. The ATS, especially, could be a serious contender against BMW’s 3 series and the Merc C-Class. It seems as if Cadillac are finally delving back into their ancestry and producing cars which look the part.

The high finish on the inside is smart and sensible. It looks developed and wholesome, not a cheap imitation, trying too hard to be modern and creative, which can be said of the previous cars. I love the blue and red instrument illumination, reminiscent of past Volkswagen design – which makes the interior appear all the more individual. The little details in the XTS such as the stitching on the dashboard and wood inlay on the steering wheel make the car look finished and boasts quality.

 

We will just have to wait until 2013 and hear from across the pond if the XTS and ATS are as good as the promo shots suggest. I, for one am eager to see if Cadillac is able to make a well-deserved comeback.

 So, Cadillac, make sure you don’t disappoint.

Do it for Elvis, Do it for Marilyn, Do it for Al, Do it for Sugar Ray.

Make em’ proud.

Real Housewives of ATL

I am obsessed with Bravo's franchise of Real Housewives. Atlanta and New Jersey are my favourites, and OC comes shortly after. New York should have been cancelled a long time ago as they already have a topical show similar; I think its called Ru Pauls drag race. (Its full of drag queens basically).

So, while I have the unfortunate pleasure of living with dull UK televison I have to wait for all my favourite US shows to be uploaded onto websites. The latest episode of Real Housewives of ATL made my night. Sheree and Marlo (The convict) had THE stupidest argument. Would you believe that two grown women were actually fighting about why one wasn't invited by the other. In the words of Big Ang (Mob wives reference) "Get over it already".

On top of the two gyals fighting, Marlo and Sheree weirdly started speaking in some weird-ass language and with which my body shrouded over in embarassment and eventually blossomed into laughter. I can't explain in writing, so it's best you see it for yourself...

I'm not a massive fan of Marlo nor Sheree, but on this occassion I was Team Sheree. I just wish Kim Zolciak would come back onto our screens for longer air time because her and Nene are truely what makes RHOA.

*I do not own this video, it is property of roogabooga89 via Youtube.*

So, tell us about yourself...

This blogging thing is quite addictive!

I suppose I should let you know a bit more about me...

I have an unashamed love for the United States of America: It is my promised land. I have always found America to be magnetic in it's culture, it's people and it's geography. Brochures and Tv shows do not do it justice. I took part in an International choir tour around Canada with my school in 2004 and ever since have returned to a different part of North America every two years. I have been lucky in the fact that I have a large family peppered throughout the country and one day hope to build my life in New Jersey or California. I find America's history colourful and exciting, particularly the early 20th Century decades such as the 20's and 30's which brought Art Deco, Prohibition and also lead to the great depression. Not surprisingly The Great Gatsby is at fault for my indulgent dreams.

Aside from my stars and stripes obsession, I am at home behind the wheel. I probably could tell the make, model and possibly even engine capacity of a any pre 1992 car before it came into view by the time i was 3. Instead of writing about topical curriculum literacy, I would form endless prose containing the adventures of a Mk 2 Ford Fiesta. I can still, to this day distinguish a vehicle by it's headlights in the dark, or it's age by trim level and badge font. I have been driving for four years, and in that time have owned four cars. No, I haven't written them all off, I'm just like Jay-Z: On to the next one. I dislike Ferrari and don't care much for Lamborghini. I don't see my cars as a means to get from A to B, because I want to get to C, D, E right through to Z - And I definitely dont want to live life in the slow lane.

I'm highly materialistic, opinionated and probably quite cringey to go with that BUT I'm just doing me. Drake hits the nail on the head...

"I want the money, the cars and the clothes, the hoes, I suppose, I just want to be successful"

I'm also about my nearest and dearest. I don't believe a lonely life is a happy one - that's not to say I NEED company 24/7, I don't. But I do appreciate and love having loyal, trusting, caring friends and family who I know will hold me down, like I will do for them too. If I am not with these special people, I'll be behind the leather bound wheel of the love of my life...

Trial & Error

So, at 20 years of age and two years into my PR degree, I've decided to start a blog. I have no idea what way this will go, and there is no definitive theme as of yet.

I suppose for the meantime it will be anecdotal and experimental. There probably will be some swearing and a pinch of sarcasm, but only time will tell if i get the hang of things. So until then, bear with me and watch this space

- Josh